Motorcycle Girls

50 Reasons Not to Date a Biker

50 Reasons Not to Date a Biker

50 Reasons Not to Date a Biker

Photo credit: @EveryStockPhoto

  1. We have grease under our fingernails
  2. We never ask for directions – getting lost is usually the point on a motorcycle
  3. We always have helmet hair
  4. Speeding tickets
  5. It’s perfectly natural to have a motorcycle parked in the living room, no matter what her mother says
  6. The way we look at our bike reminds you of the way we used to look at you
  7. You’ll have to park your new car outside because the garage is full of bikes
  8. We invite our biker friends over…all the time
  9. If the weather is nice, we’re not home
  10. We spend more on tires than we spend on you
  11. The bike gets washed and waxed twice a month, the car? Never
  12. We “need” a bunch of expensive riding gear, usually 2 or 3 of each
  13. We smell like leather and gasoline

50 Reasons Not to Date a Biker

Photo credit: @Pixabay

  1. Can’t find us? We’re in the garage
  2. One bike is fine, but 5 bikes are better
  3. Our idea of a date night is riding to a sleazy biker bar
  4. The sound of a bike starting up is your morning alarm clock
  5. We rev our engines when going under bridges
  6. If another bike or car wants to race, you better hold on
  7. Yes, the bike gets a Christmas gift
  8. You’ll have to help us with bike projects, because sometimes it takes 3 hands
  9. You’ll have a burn mark or two from the exhaust
  10. We have stupid looking tans from riding in sunglasses
  11. We think leather bras are fine lingerie
  12. We have no patience for bad drivers
  13. If you take us to a winery, we’ll order a beer
  14. The garage is decorated nicer than the house
  15. You’ll have to come rescue us when we run out of gas on the other side of town
  16. We buy batteries more often than flowers

50 Reasons Not to Date a Biker

Photo credit: @EveryStockPhoto

  1. The fridge in the garage is better stocked than the one in the house
  2. You’ll wonder if “riding bitch” is a verb or a noun
  3. We pay more for insurance than your car payment
  4. We never shave, Movember applies all year
  5. We wear our riding boots to church
  6. Beer is the base of our food pyramid
  7. Chicken wings and beer is fine dining
  8. Everyone will start telling you stories of someone they knew who was disfigured in a motorcycle accident
  9. Your family will be a worried wreck

50 Reasons Not to Date a Biker

Photo credit: @Roadkill Customs

  1. We want to make anything with a motor go faster, including the lawn mower and the blender
  2. We decorate with racing posters and bikini calendars
  3. We get 7 different motorcycle magazines a month
  4. The only acceptable pizza is a meat lovers
  5. We’ll have to go on every charity ride and poker run. It’s for charity!
  6. We’re closer to our riding buddies than our family
  7. You’ll spend an hour scraping ice off your car in the winter because there’s no room in the garage
  8. We have scars and talk about them proudly
  9. You’ll have to learn to communicate with hand signals and pokes, because we can’t hear you back there
  10. You’ll probably be cold, wet, and miserable on many rides
  11. Your hair will be wrecked
  12. You’ll have to spend a bunch of money on a jacket, riding boots, helmet and gloves
  13. We listen to loud, obnoxious music
  14. The best t-shirt is a wet t-shirt…on you!
  15. If we sell a bike, we’ll be heartbroken and whiny until we get another one…or two
  16. Mufflers are optional

50 Reasons Not to Date a Biker

Photo credit: @Flickr

  1. We take our clean bike to the bikini car wash
  2. You already know the answer to the ultimatum, “It’s me or the bike!”
  3. Eventually, you’ll swallow a bug
  4. We can’t count

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